Changes

Just some pieces I was playing with this afternoon that I thought I would share.

– Scorpio Rising

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Forest Faeries

When I was a small girl I loved nothing more than immersing myself in the mysterious tall trees of my neighbourhood.  When I couldn’t speak with, listen to and press myself against their all-knowing, slender trunks, I would bury myself in the wildly overgrown patch of garden at my family home.

This, I aptly nicknamed ‘the jungle’, as it was the only untouched area of my parents’ otherwise-immaculate quarter acre section.  The jungle was dark, damp, mysterious and hidden from the world of adults.  There I would huddle alone, while silently communicating with surrounding tree and fern spirits.

My Earth Sun transmuted my Pisces imagination away from the typical water-oriented escapism into a very earth-driven fantasyland, complete with faeries, whispers in the wind and the innate knowledge that there is always so much more to our world than meets the conventional eye.

– Pisces Rising

About a boy

I miss you,

and think of you

often.

 

Sometimes I am sad,

other times happy,

remembering the good times.

 

The way you used to look at me,

and how sometimes you still do.

But mostly it is gone,

evaporated, unable to get back.

 

This makes me sad.

and miss you.

 

But then I try to remember you,

who you really are,

how you hurt me,

how you failed me.

 

I try to remember this about you,

more often.

 

But mostly I miss you,

and am stupidly stuck on the good,

the love between us,

now evaporated.

 

I must try harder to let you go,

for myself, my freedom.

I know this is what is best,

recommended.

 

But that part of me doesn’t want to.

It wants to hold onto the happy,

remember how you looked at me,

and risk it all just to glimpse that again.

As sometimes I do

 

And until it is no longer,

I will remember

and hope

for tomorrow

 

I wrote this a long time ago about a boy I knew.  I still see him sometimes, but when reading this I didn’t seem to connect with it anymore.  So it would seem I have gotten over him.  But it did take me a long, long time.  And he’s not even a Scorpio or Libra.  I wonder, perhaps, if my Scorpio ascendant has anything to do with my inability to completely let go of him?  Still waters run deep.  Is a part of him sitting at the bottom of my ocean?  Or is it some other complex piece of my Natal Chart?  I love that astrology can explain some of lives mysteries, but some we will never really get explained to us.  Perhaps love is one of these things.  Because as much as astrology can conduct compatibility reports, compatibility is certainly nothing to do with love.  Love is its own thing, outside the explainable.

Hmm, I guess the joy is to keep guessing and wondering and growing our minds x

– Scorpio Rising

The Sacred Feminine

Maybe it’s because I’m a woman myself or perhaps the existing catalogue of visual representations have permeated my psyche, but for whatever reason, I draw strong, instinctive associations between the sign of Scorpio and its females.

Aside from the much-worn gender cliches of the Sacred Feminine being akin to nature’s notoriously devious assassins (as opposed to the roarers and boastful killers of the animal kingdom) and the supposedly obvious parallels between a cunning woman and the subtle stalking techniques of the scorpion, there are more positive associative factors to speak of.

Things that make many of us instinctively relate the female Scorpio Suns & Ascendants of this world with their namesake, much stronger than we do men.  I find the veiled sensuality and limitless strength of Scorpios one of their great incomparable assets, something I personally have witnessed time and again in the women I’ve encountered with strong Plutonian influences.  Female Scorpios also seem to naturally embrace the so-called ‘darkness’ of the sign; long black hair, kohl-lined lids, erotic tattoo art and a tendency to not walk, so much as glide across any surface.

Easy to understand how a Scorpio woman – with her gift of healing, intuition, perceptiveness and sexuality could find herself burning at the stake.  Remembering too that the method of identifying a witch was to thrust her, fully bound, into a body of water with the notion that if she survived, her true self was revealed.  Mere coincidence that our Puritanical ancestors were seemingly-privy to the magic of water as it related to the most powerful water sign?

– Pisces Rising

If Jesus was a Pisces

Was Jesus Christ a pisces,

represented by the fish?

Of empathy and soulfulness

and supernatural gifts.

With healing hands and open heart,

pure in love and grace.

Who gave his life so selflessly

to save us from our shame.

Who couldn’t hate

and wouldn’t fight

against the rising tide

that swept that fish

away from Truth

in favour of man’s pride.

If Jesus was a pisces,

and I believe he was,

how he must weep to witness

all humanity’s become.

We’ve lost the fish,

lost the love and ritualized the calm

that Jesus and his Father

gifted old Jerusalem.

If we remember Jesus

for all he truly was,

remember too that love and joy

can never be outdone.

That hate and fear and prejudice

are daily magnified

by ruthless-minded souls who

merely build their own decline.

If Jesus was a pisces

(this much I’m certain of)

he will remain a pisces

and guide us through his love.

– Pisces Rising

Revelations

For the last couple of years I have had a strong (ever growing) interest in astrology.  First I looked at sun signs (or star signs as they are more commonly known) and soon discovered the natal chart which reveals so, so much more.  I was truly fascinated.  For all you skeptics out there, I would totally recommend looking at your own natal chart.  There are heaps of websites that can do this for you, all you need to know is where and when you were born to the hour or there about.  We all display our sun signs but can often become skeptical upon meeting another Aries and discovering the two of you are nothing alike.  It’s easy to say, “Star signs are crap, I’m nothing like you, blah blah they’re such bullshit”.  But this, my friend, is where natal charts (especially your ascendant or rising sign) come into play.  So you may be an Aries with Pisces rising and find other Aries nothing like you.  They may seem self centered and somewhat rude or dismissive.  You may feel they are rather shallow and lack the spirituality that you possess.  This is because having a Pisces ascendant will automatically soften you and bless you with the great gift of empathy.  No two Aries are the same.  Undoubtedly, you will posses similar attributes and nature, but your personal natal chart provides you with all your quirks and things that make you special and fun.

Personally, I found a lot of solace in discovering my natal chart.  Most importantly, my Scorpio ascendant.  Growing up I was quiet and private and it took me a long time to open up and feel comfortable with people.  I am still like this.  When I was younger I saw these things as somewhat negative.  Not entirely, but qualities like being shy are never really praised or admired.  They’re more things we’re taught to overcome or grow out of.  We don’t expect adults to be shy.  We expect them to be confident and competent.  Part of growing up is allegedly growing out of these childish traits.  But, as I am sure we have all learnt, this is not true.  So until very recently, I thought I needed to work on being more confident, friendly, open etc.  This is what friends told me.  I was told to try new things and that I would just adore ‘Insert-Something-I-Hate’ if I only gave it a go.  I felt like I should try these things.  That was what growing up and becoming a fully-formed person meant.  However, even when I tried new things, I discovered I could never embrace them.  I just felt incredibly uncomfortable, unhappy and frequently bored.

For me, new experiences (especially those I have zero interest in attempting) are not rewarding.  They do not help me grow or become more confident.  The truth Is that I am quite content with who I am and my level of confidence.  I am fully aware of who I am, my strengths and weaknesses, how I approach situations and so on.  The problem was (and I use past tense deliberately, as I have thankfully overcome this) that I used to listen to people and think their way was the right way and that my way was wrong.  Because in certain people’s eyes, being confident is public speaking or addressing strangers.  Being confident is dancing in public and not being afraid to ask questions.  Trying new things.  But for me, confidence does not mean these things.  I don’t know what I consider confidence, but I do know that trying to do the above mentioned things does not make me more confident than I already am.  Arguably, it makes me feel less confident.  I suppose for me, confidence is knowing who you are and standing for what you believe in.  Confidence is the ability to accept and love yourself, despite friends or family telling you what’s allegedly wrong with you solely because this differs to themselves.

I breathed a sigh of relief upon reading about my Scorpio ascendant.  It explained why I am who I am.  Why I – yes, even as an adult – am reserved and private.  But also why I am extremely perceptive.  Why I like black and love my long, dark hair.  Why I don’t need or want to be the centre of attention.  Why I am attractive to the opposite sex (that’s a good one).  And for some reason, seeing this written down made me recognise these traits as legitimate (not to mention permanent) parts of me.  It explained why I don’t enjoy or respond well to things some of my friends enjoy.  It gave me such an acceptance for who I am.

What a truly beautiful gift I had been given.

What I am trying to get at here is that astrology is so fascinating and helpful to our lives and we should all look into it.  I think it’s hugely important to have an understanding of one’s self.  I not only gained more acceptance for who I am, but for others too.  Do your natal chart.  See what you find.  Come on, we all love reading about ourselves.  And you can disagree or agree, but at least it will get you thinking about who you are.  We need to do this more.  Because how can we even fathom to understand and accept others if we can’t understand our own selves.  Remember that everyone has an equally complex and fascinating chart.  So when someone responds to something in a way you find odd, respect that.  It’s their nature; the way they are programmed.  Just as you are programmed in your own special way.  They probably find your responses strange too.  But that’s the joy of life.

– Scorpio Rising